Many of my favourite books or movies provide me with more insight and understanding each time I read or watch them. I come out at the end feeling edified and filled with knowledge. I improve my trivia questions on the subject and become one step closer to being a bonafide expert in that particular field. Frozen, however, is not one of those movies. Granted, I haven't yet dedicated a passionate amount of time in dissecting this 2013 Disney animated feature, however, each time I do watch, all I seem to find myself with is more questions and major frustrations.
Here is a short compilation of questions I have when I watch Frozen:
1. Why are these men leaving an orphan boy and baby reindeer alone in a frozen tundra?
2. How are these girls not dying of hypothermia?
3. Aren't you going to be in a crap-ton of trouble for creating a snow storm at 3am?
4. How did the parents sleep through that whole pRty then come running as soon as they are called?
5. Parents, is that really what you sleep in?
6. Why are there trolls?
7. Is this little boy seriously an orphan?
8. Now adopted by trolls?
9. And that's all the explanation we are going to get? Neat.
10. Wow, parents, have you really never read Macbeth/Oedipus Rex? There is essentially no way you trying to avoid this prophecy could go well.
11. How is separating your two children from each other a good idea?
12. When has telling a child she has to change everything about herself ever worked well?
13. Has anyone ever told you that you are the WORST PARENTS IN THE WORLD?!
14. Who hurt you, Disney?
15. Why must all the parents die?
15. Why must all the parents die?
16. Who has been running the country while the girls are alone in the castle?
17. Is it really necessary for Elsa to do the coronation ungloved?
18. Are you suggesting that a man is evil simply because he is a bad dancer?
19. Anna, what if this Hans guy is an axe murderer?
20. How did Anna buy those things?
21. Do you have a credit card in your bra?
21. Do you have a credit card in your bra?
22. Why doesn't Kristoff recognize Anna from the night he was mysteriously adopted by trolls?
23. Where did Elsa's clothes go?
24. What is she going to sleep in or eat?
24. What is she going to sleep in or eat?
25. Why can't anyone in this movie just communicate like healthy adults?
26. Why are the trolls "love experts"? Do love experts really tell parents to suppress their children?
27. How is Olaf the smartest character in this movie?
28. Why would people just assume the princess is dead without checking the body?
29. At what point did everyone decide that Elsa wasn't evil?
30. Why is the man from Weasel Town evil?
And finally, probably the most important question: Why would anyone ever say this movie is better than Tangled?
